Dick’s Guide to Stuff: Tiip #85
Stop screaming at your kids in public…pull them really close and whisper instead.
Trust me, that shit’s a WHOLE lot scarier…
Dick’s Thoughts:
Why can’t we just make everyday Mother’s Day, and treat mom with love and thanks year round?
Aaand, I don’t need to buy a gift now.
Dick’s Question of the Day:
How much of this “no more tears” shampoo do I have to feed this baby to get it to stop crying?
Stuff About Dick:
If my last name was Smith I’d name my kids Black, Silver, Gun, and Lock.
Dick’s Thoughts:
I bet bunnies would be super-stoked if we introduced them to salad dressing.
Stuff about Dick:
When I accidentally run over someone’s cat in the neighbourhood, i place the cat under their car to let them think they killed it.
Dick’s Thoughts:
Tumblr is the government’s elaborate plan to keep us all off the streets
“I’ll be black”
Stuff About Dick:
According to math, I’m broke.
Dick’s Guide to Dating: #58
Save money on contraceptives by repeatedly punching yourself in the nuts.
